Updated: Dec 2, 2020
Domestic violence is a form of a malicious act committed against a woman by her significant other and boyfriend when he abuses her physically, mentally, and/or emotionally. Millions of women from all over the world have been reported suffering from these kinds of attacks from their spouse or boyfriend.
To put into the perspective, let’s take an example: A man who living happily with his wife/girlfriend until something gets wrong or terrible happens in their life which changes them for the worse. They start unleashing their anger and frustration out on their wives or girlfriends because that’s a form of displacement, a type of defense mechanism where an individual unleashes out on a target that is less threatening than their original intended targets. That seems to be a severe problem for several women because they have to endure their husbands' and boyfriends’ anger and paranoia. Many women, when they’re abused by their partners, tend to have marks, rashes, scars, and injuries on their face and body, which is shown symbolically as a sign of trauma that would be deeply embedded in their minds for a long time. How this happens is when their partners whip them with a belt, slap them, kick them, hit them in the face, yell at them, curse, scream at them, and blame them for all the trouble that’s happened in the recent months and weeks. The women who suffer from domestic violence have reportedly suffered from PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) which gives them flashbacks, nightmares, makes them numb, unresponsive and causes them to feel a significant sense of paranoia which makes them highly alert of any dangers that might come their way.
Reporting to the authorities
It’s reported from all over the world that females who are suffering from domestic violence, never try to report to the authorities and officials what’s happening to them and whenever their family members, friends, and acquaintances ask them, they would instantly deny it and ask them not to talk about it or question them of what happened which brings the topic into the question of why women don’t report to the authorities.
Causes may be several:
They’re scared of retaliation
They would be disowned by their family members
Their children would be put at risk
They would suffer from financial strains and isolation
Their partner would use their children as bait to get them back
They feel they are a character of no morals and values so they deserve to have these things happen to them, and
They believe that if they begin to love their spouse, they could change their mindset and put an end to it.
It’s a tragedy that when women suffer in the hands of these cowards, they don’t tend to fight back and for the rest of their lives would be kept in misery, isolation, and as a poisoner or slave in the household under their partner’s commands and orders.
The tragedy of it!
Other time it happens in specific countries is because of patriarchal traditions and a constant lack of egalitarianism. Patriarchal traditions are when the women are living under the shadow of the men and they have to obey the men’s desires and goals. If they try to break it, they would suffer the brutal repercussions and consequences of their actions.
It breaks my heart whenever I see a woman with bruises all over her body and on her face and it makes my blood boil with anger, hatred, and rage over her partner due to what he is doing to her and how innocent she is. Moreover, she hasn’t done anything wrong but due to her partner’s sectarian mind and attitude towards her and his attempt to control her private and public life, she is his pet at his home with no feelings, emotions, or being treated as a human being.
Many women have tried their best to report to the authorities and officials what happened but because they have no proof or evidence of what’s happened to them, the police tend to place the entire blame on them and have them arrested instead. That makes the justice system extremely flawed.
Cases increased in Pandemic
In the year 2020, when the entire world is dealing with the coronavirus, many studies have reported cases of domestic violence/abuse in certain countries of Europe and also in India, where men, due to their frustration at not being able to work or hang out with their friends or see their siblings or parents unleash all their frustration and anger on their wives which led to physical and mental abuse. These cases haven’t decreased or gone as there are possibilities of more cases arising in France.
What does the world think?
This thing should immediately stop. Only in the last decade, many people have taken action by coming together and protesting in certain countries like India and the United States to put an end to the violence suffered by women. Although the governments have created certain laws, it’s a long way to go because it’s in the hands of men who commit these acts to their spouses. There is a saying, “if you hit a woman because you are frustrated from something, it doesn’t fix the problem, instead makes you a coward and a wimp” and this is true. Instead of lashing out at your wife, try to express your frustration openly to her and she would be able to help you because she knows you and she loves you dearly.
What needs to be done?
As we know, many women can get out of this abusive relationship by doing something about it. I want to start a conversation by the context of how the woman can escape from her abusive life.
There are two solutions she can have and here are these: Work with her relatives like parents, sisters, and brothers along with support groups. Tend to the police with enough evidence and facts that would provide them with the ability to arrest the person who has been abusing them. The effect of this action would be to restore people’s (especially women’s) trust and faith in the justice system. The authorities, along with the women, would start a campaign on the internet to provide help to other women who are abused by their spouses.
The second way is to pack all their belongings, take their children with them by fleeing the premise, and starting a new life together by relocating themselves to another community and place. Society at large must treat women as humans. They deserve to be treated as one. Please don’t be afraid to speak up and allow your voices to be heard because help would always be granted to those who ask for it.